How to tell a great mother
It's simple to tell a good mother.
It's the child you look at to find out how good the mother is. Why does it take
a man who has never raised a child to tell you this obvious fact?
And her daughter, Frances Bean, is very mature.
Read the interview below and you
can see that Courtney's daughter's conversation is not overblown
and not filled with absolutes. You can end up with problems when
a child has no supervision as their thoughts easily grow out of proportion with
reality. They can very easily become stimulus governed and that sometimes leads
to problems in their later life.
You also end up with a problem when
a child is taught rote. The child is dull and life is just a set of rules. Many
of those children are dead inside by 25 and have nothing to offer the world.
Courtney somehow raised a non -stimulus
governed daughter and that rarely happens with a stimulus governed mother. How
did she manage it so well?
I don't know! Anything else I say is just blah
blah but here it is anyway. Or drop down to the interview.
People are so judgmental as to assume
their narrow ways are the only valid ways to raise children.
They will automatically decide a
mother is wrong to teach their child Chinese before it can speak English properly.
Sometimes even if the family lives in China.
Two hundred and fifty years ago there was a
six year old child that worked in the fields from sunrise to sunset. Los Angels Child
Protection would say that this was destructive to the child's inner growth and
that it would limit his potentials in the future. They would take away the child and
put the parents in prison for years for abusing their child. That child's name was George
Washington. And he worked in the fields of his fathers plantation for about
three years solid until he went to school, but even then he still worked summers.
He got out easy though. By the age of 11 he got to ride a horse and direct the field hands while
Thomas Jefferson spent four years in the field and I never got a horse. (Notice
how when I I talk about unpleasant memories I suddenly shift and distance myself from them by writing in the third person.)
Then there are those two hippy grateful
deadheads that raised their daughter Courtney Love on the road and in communes. She
is now one of the most constructive and creative artists on the face of
you have Los Angels Child Protection approved-perfect-parents like top recording
company executive Jose and Kitty whose two sons became known as 'Menendez
brothers' after they blew them both away with 12 guage shotguns just so
they could get ahold of their own inheritance early.
It seems they just learned their
family values, specifically the father's creedo of being a ruthless recording executive:
'Do unto artists and others whatever you want and use your greed to ruthlessly
take it all even to the death unless you get caught. Then when claiming to be
innocent doesn't work anymore turn it all around. Make your victims into
victimizers and you become their victim'.
Son's whose values would make the most ruthless of
recording executives burst with pride.
So look to a child to determine how
good a mother is and never judge a mother by your standards. By doing it this
way it is both accurate and takes your personal values out the equation which
is where they should never be in the first place. Child protection services forgot this and just mis-judged Miss Courntey Love on mainly her actions.
This is a conversation between Courtney
And her daughter Francis Bean. It is excerpted from a Blender Magazine article
from May 2004 You will see what I mean when I say Frances is wise beyond
her years as you ask yourself 'which one is the mother?' That is the effect
of loving your children.
Back upstairs, Frances, in her
fantasy Grammy gown, is teaching Grandpa Frank a series of dance steps for the
after-parties she hopes to attend. Were going, arent we, Mommy?
she asks. Of course! Love answers. Love asks Blender which stars
are scheduled to attend the ceremonies, and Blender proceeds to reel off the
names. Hear that, Frances? The White Stripes! Maybe Ill meet Jack
White and hell be my new boyfriend! Sometimes, she offers, mommies
need to get laid, too. But Mommy, Frances replies, you
intimidate men. Blender then mentions that Janet Jackson has declined
to appear on account of the fallout from her Super Bowl flashdance. Janet
inappropriate, Frances argues. But Ive shown
my tits in front of people, honey, Love counters.
But this was in front of
children, Frances says with great wisdom, and with that walks out of the
Frances Bean Cobain is a healthy,
good-hearted, engaged, by-all-appearances normal 11-year-old
girl whos also the spitting image of her late dad. Shes a
sweeter person than her father, thats for sure, James Barber says.
Shes open and trusting. Shes her mothers child.
The famous rock & roll offspring
is crazy about animals Frances has had 18 pets, including horses, and
loves to ride. Her favorite subject is science. Her favorite TV show is Charmed.
She thinks Justin Timberlake is gross: Yuccch! If she wrote an autobiography,
she says, she would title it The Girl Who Never Gave Up. She very obviously
loves her mom.
The day before, Frances came by
the Blender photo shoot accompanied by Loves stepfather, Frank Rodriguez,
a calm, tender, 60-year-old retired schoolteacher who is currently acting as
Francess guardian while Love pursues reunification with her daughter.
Love is allowed unlimited visits with Frances as long as Rodriguez is present.
As Mom is painstakingly tended
to by a hair-and-makeup team, Frances runs over and gives her a big kiss and
a hug. Talk quickly turns to this weekends Grammy Awards. They are going
to attend together Courtney, Frances and Frank and Frances is
practically jumping out of her skin with excitement. She has brought along the
dress she picked out for the nights festivities, a pale blue Betsey Johnson
satin slip dress.
Come here, baby, and show
Mommy your dress! Love cries as her hair-and-makeup attendants hopelessly
attempt to keep her still. Frances pulls out the dress and anxiously holds it
up to her torso. Do you like it, Mommy?
I do, Franny, its
beautiful, but I think it may be a bit too sexy. Go and try it on, and well
Polaroid it. Loves eyes well with tears. My babys all
grown up, she says. I cant believe it. Mommy,
puh-leeze, no more crying, Frances says.
Love manages a laugh. Shes
tired of seeing Mommy cry.
Its OK, Mommy,
Frances says. I dont have to wear this dress. For an 11-year-old,
her empathy is acute: She knows that the Grammy night is not just a fun, dressy
mother/daughter night out, but a crucial opportunity to show the world that
they belong together, that they love each other, that their lives arent
one continuous reenactment of Mommie Dearest.
Tell you what, baby,
Love says. I bet you the nice stylist here can make you your very own
dress! And you can draw what you want it to look like and pick out the colors
and everything. Frances lights up what 11-year-old girl wouldnt?
and she begins frantically describing her dream gown to the clothing
Just dont make my
daughter look like some 15-year-old trying to get backstage, Love cackles.
I know that look.
© 2005 John